Defining Our Terms
Red Flags are any number of warning signs in our daily
lives. Unless we are informed, mindful, and fully understand what we are witnessing or doing, we might miss and be unable
to rectify issues early enough to influence outcomes. And if not seen and acted upon quickly, these warning signs could
take an individual, family or other group down a negative path with potentially long-term, even dire consequences. The
Red Flag process is about connecting the dots of cause and effect, an acumen which can quite literally change
or save lives.
QUICK TIPS: Print out these "Warning Signs of a Heart Attack" and "Stroke Warning
Signs" today for easy access in your home and office.
* http://www.heart.org/idc/groups/heart-public/@wcm/@hcm/documents/downloadable/ucm_304575.pdf *
http://www.strokeassociation.org/idc/groups/heart-public/@wcm/@hcm/documents/downloadable/ucm_434181.pdf
Mental
Health at Risk on a Large Scale
As shocking
as it may be for us to believe, the National Institute of Mental Health cites that approximately 57.7 million Americans—nearly
1 in 4 adults—experience a mental disorder in a given year.(1) Add to that the U.S. Surgeon
General's assertion that 10% of adolescents and children "suffer from serious emotional and mental disorders that cause
significant functional impairment in their day-to-day lives."(2) These numbers and their impacts compound exponentially when you
consider the ripple effects on family members and others, especially if a disorder goes unrecognized, undiagnosed, and untreated.
And we are not only talking about quality of life, but life itself in many cases.
However, there is hope.
Each one of us can acquire a higher level of knowledge, awareness, and vigilance towards the people around us.
In so doing, we might be able to see the red flags and aid in changing the course of a downward
spiral that, if left unchecked, could persist for years or even decades. More serious disabilities and consequences
can be averted if we understand what we are witnessing, and choose to help.
EXAMPLE:
A parent’s bipolar disorder, often undiagnosed and untreated
until the children are grown, impacts the family in a myriad of corrosive ways. Here are just a few:
*
Life in a constant state of red alert
* An ongoing condition of chaos
* Emotional unavailability
*
Walking on eggshells
* Boundary bullying
* Extreme manipulation of family members and their loyalties
* Spending frenzies that can impact the financial stability of the family(3)
The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) provides valuable information on several serious conditions, including:
* Major depression
* Schizophrenia
* Bipolar disorder
* Obsessive compulsive
disorder
* Panic disorder
* Post traumatic stress disorder
* Borderline personality disorder
Information:http://www.nami.org/Content/NavigationMenu/Inform_Yourself/About_Mental_Illness/About_Mental_Illness.htm
 An Obsession with Fame is Indicative of
Deeper Psychological Issues
Not surprisingly, there is a
new condition entitled "Hollywood NOS," but its manifestations can impact anyone who is obsessed with
fame and fortune. Here are just a few symptoms:
* Impulsiveness
* Anxiety
* Poor self-esteem
* Some personality
disorder traits, like "an overall fixation on their hierarchal status..., a very rich fantasy life about what other
people are thinking of them, and an opportunistic analysis of relationships, where every connection is evaluated on its usefulness
in getting a job."
— From the "What Makes Sammy Run Wild" news article by Rachel
Abramowitz available in its entirety here: http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/la-ca-hollywoodnos14-2010feb14,0,7569097,full.story
Pre-College Students Under Far Too
Much Pressure in
Our Performance Oriented Culture
"When success is defined by high grades, test scores, trophies—we
know we end up with unprepared, disengaged, exhausted, and ultimately unhealthy kids." This quotation comes from
a recent documentary entitled Race to Nowhere. As adults, it is imperative that we reflect
upon how we can nurture and guide our young students to fulfill their potential, while still thriving and truly
enjoying their lives.
For more information about the film, visit http://www.racetonowhere.com/
For information about the effects of
persistent stress
on the body, click on http://www.qualityoflifenews.com/id4.html
Toxic Manipulation: How to Spot It in Others
& Yourself
Manipulative
behaviors can be immensely damaging to relationships, trust, and integrity. Here's a resource to help you identify
and eliminate manipulation in your life:
http://www.cyberrecovery.net/forums/showthread.php?t=20166
Take the "Manipulative Behavior Inventory" test
on behalf of yourself or others. Keep in mind that even something as seemingly harmless as flirting to get what you
want from an acquaintance is a form of manipulation, and perhaps even a deeper insecurity requiring constant reassurance.
In general, it is important for us to consider consciously relying on our talents and intelligence versus
manipulation. This reliance constitutes a truer and higher approach that will surely enhance all of our
interactions.
Distracted Driving a Major Threat
AAA traffic safety experts provide some disturbing statistics. Texting on a cell phone, and many other "distracting"
behaviors—like talking on a cell phone (even hands-free), eating or drinking—are more hazardous than you might
think.
TEXTING EXAMPLES:
* A Southern California commuter train crashed because the operator was
texting. The result: 25 fatalities and 135 injuries.
* A 17-year-old Illinois girl was texting friends
while behind the wheel, drove off the road, and died.
Access the full article at: http://www.viamagazine.com/top_stories/articles/president_page_jan10.asp
(1) NAMI website as of 12-19-2009
(2) NAMI website as of 12-19-2009
(3) Excerpted from the book: "Inspirations for Thriving
in Our Troubled World."
See the Products page of this website for more information.
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"Violence" Manifests in 6 Forms
Abuse and the damaging of trust can assume many forms. It is more widespread than you might
think, and is perpetrated by men, women, and young people toward adults. This excerpt from a “Center
for Domestic Peace” document is particularly compelling. The list
is also significant because many people might have a narrow definition of violence and say “I am not violent,”
not understanding some of the more subtle and varied forms of abuse.
“The Six Types of Violence: PEEVSS (www.CenterForDomesticPeace.org).
* Physical violence can be described as violence to someone
(hitting, restraining, spitting, shaking, etc.) or violence done around someone (like throwing or breaking objects,
etc. with the implied message of "You're next!").
* Emotional violence is deliberately withholding yourself, your services, or the 4 A's (Acceptance,
Appreciation, Attention, & Affection).
* Economic
abuse is controlling someone's financial resources. It includes such behaviors as trying to keep someone from
getting or keeping a job, making them ask for money, giving them allowance, taking their money.
* Verbal violence can be described as violence that is threatening, thingifying
(name calling) or trivializing which constitute the "3-Ts".
* Sexual violence is sexual behavior that crosses someone's boundary without his/her permission.
In addition to the more obvious manifestations like rape or kissing and fondling without permission, this also includes subtler
sexual violence of an emotional nature such as withholding sex from your partner in order to control or coerce him/her. It
also includes flirting with someone else in the presence of your partner.
* Spiritual abuse is when someone behaves in such a way that your spirit, will or morale is drained
and even demeaned. Mocking your spiritual beliefs and customs or denying practice of these. Using improper interpretation
of spiritual doctrines to control you or family members."
 The
U.S. Department of Justice estimates that “women are five to eight times more likely than men to be victimized by
an intimate partner.” Based on the latest research, the Center for Domestic Peace organization
asserts that domestic violence springs from a superiority belief system. The ramifications of this represent
a pivotal social issue. Center for Domestic Peace’s work in the community centers around teaching a system for creating
equality, which is absolutely necessary in order to engender healthy interpersonal relating.
As we further explore domestic violence, it is also
critical to acknowledge that women can be the abusers of their male partners, and in alarmingly increasing numbers.
Tyrannical
World Leaders & Their Own Histories of Child Abuse
Alice Miller, a renowned Swiss psychotherapist and author, has put
forth powerful theories in her essay entitled The Political Consequences of Child Abuse. Here are a few compelling
examples of the manifestation of empathy-killing childhood abuse:
*
Hitler, whose regime was responsible for the deaths of 6 million Jews plus another 5-8 million non-Jews(4), had
been beaten mercilessly as a child every day by his father.
* Mao, who sent 30 million people
to their deaths, had been regularly whipped by his father.
* Stalin, who perpetrated suffering and death
upon millions, had been whipped by his drunken father almost daily.
Alice Miller's full essay
is here: http://www.psychohistory.com/htm/06_politic.htmlThese three individuals are worst-case archetypes. However, any of the 6 forms of
violence cited in our earlier section above distort and corrode the human spirit. They can—if persistent,
merciless, and disempowering—severely damage the abused young person, as well as countless others caught in
the ensuing ripple effect.
NOTE
2009 Austrian film with a related theme, The White Ribbon—Abused
and suppressed children are subjected to ritual punishment in a German village just prior to World War I. Their treatment
sows the seeds for future Naziism.http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1149362/
(4) Data as cited on the Wikipedia page for Adolph Hitler, Holocaust
section.
A High Percentage of People Who Abuse Animals
Escalate Their Violence to
Include Humans
Psychology and criminology
research details case after case of individuals who perpetrate child abuse, rape, school shootings, or serial killings had
also previously indulged in animal cruelty, torture or murder (often all 3). The statistics are shocking and horrifying,
especially when we take into account that authorities failed to examine the perpetrators' childhood or early violence
only because it was directed at animals rather than people.
Read the full factsheet here, plus learn about
preventive strategies for your community: http://www.peta.org/mc/factsheet_display.asp?ID=132
NOTE: Text for the "Violence Manifests in 6 Forms" section
of this right column above is excerpted from the book: "Inspirations for Thriving in Our Troubled World."
See the Products page of this website for more information.
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